We’ve all heard it haven’t we, in some shape or another. You know, don’t think negatively about others. But to actually really own it and to live it, ah well that’s a different kettle of fish entirely.

I’ve caught myself many times trying the subtle art of nobility.

“Man don’t judge” but only to cast that aside as quickly as it arrived with “yeah but they are being such @#$@s right now, they deserve to be judged. Tools.” Yep, this flighty tongue has had a mighty way with words out loud and more often than not unspoken.

And those little darts, barbs that are thrown out into the ether are not just words are they? Nope, they more often than not come loaded with some emotion, sometimes a bucket load.

Yet while we might think, “hey, I’m not harming anyone am I, I’m entitled to think whatever I like. After all, I don’t have to agree and like everyone do I”.

Is correct in part, my take is only the second part of that (not having to agree or like).

But the reality is we are in fact harming someone… Ourselves (and others but that’s a different topic all together).

These negative judgements really come at a cost, and I believe an expensive one.

It is the cost of our own happiness, the cost of our joy, the cost of ourselves.

“Oh boy, sure, sure, you’re going to try that on, me thinking someone else sucks costs me my happiness, I’m as happy as a pig in mud…”

That’s great, but yep, I am.

Now quick side note: The italics is actually my voice as well, as it was a conversation I had with myself many times in the past, and still the odd one today.

Okay back to the story.

So yes. I am 100%, think crappy thoughts about others costs us happiness and a sense of self.


Well, think just for one moment, if we are truly deeply happy, why in the world would we think negatively about others. Putting a negative charge out there just because someone did something or said something.

And please understand I am not saying not using intellect and the choice of disagreeing with actions or words. As there are so many ghastly things that take place every day that I do not agree with (and not that I have to as they are going to happen regardless of my approval or disapproval) but my input changes nothing in terms of what has “taken” place.

Our power lies in our choice of how we respond, and this shows us a lot about what is going on in our inner world.

As at the core of consciousness, thinking crappy thoughts about others is purely a reflection of our own state of consciousness.

Yep, that’s a eye brow raiser for some. And whilst some of you go straight away, yeah I get it. I’m equally sure a lot would be thinking… Ah, say what.

But think about it, your thoughts are only a pure reflection of what is going on inside you.

Every judgement, every thought and every emotion whether directed to another person or not is merely a reflection of your inner world. Not to get too cosmic or any thing, by inner world I mean your consciousness. If we were talking about a computer it would be your software (which can always be upgraded..).

It also gets a little deeper here, as thinking is an expression of energy, so something inside us has been stimulated by the senses (sight, sound, touch etc) that has caused us to react on the subconscious level which then triggers the negative thought to rise.

So stimulus occurs, creates energy, emotion rises, then thought, speech and or action occurs (or not). And just for a moment, put the stimulus to the side (the event that triggered response) why would we choose to think negatively and go into that energetic space.

As if we acknowledge that it stems from an energy within, why would we go negative?

And I am also not saying accept all things, peace love and mung beans, hey they just punched me in the face, let me stand here and give them love whilst they do it again.

Nope, our intellect is the key here. Emotions as wonderful as they are, are really not that great in thinking rationally or aiding us to act out of our highest consciousnesses. They can really derail intellect (check the science, when negative emotions rise up, intellect – prefrontal cortex, our CEO – goes off line) and therefore we end up acting and saying things we do not think about, and a lot of the time can regret… I’m sure we’ve all experienced that.

Anyway back to the energy component.

As this is what really makes us suffer, as it is the energy at the root of the thought or words that is the concern. This energy that judges, condescends, pokes fun at and generally can enjoy others in misery is a thing that is rotten at the root.

It loves you to keep thinking crap about others. It is the domain of pure ego. “Oh glorious drama, let’s keep serving that up”, says drama!

It loves to have conflict and wants you to believe you are better than others, or less than.

This energy if constantly watered will never loosen its grip until you become closed off, bitter and “justified” in your world. But happy? No. Impossible.

It is an energy that lives and dies in suffering.


Yep, and our ego may right now tell us, BS, this guys an idiot, I don’t buy it it is just thoughts (but I’m guessing if you have read this far, that may not be you as they probably would read the headline and checked out straight away).

So is it really, truly that bad?


I could also go into the quantum physics angle (research the Superstring Unified Field Theory) which states at the smallest unit of life we are all connected. It is mind blowing science. Not voodoo stuff. The stuff that geniuses like Einstein, delve into. But we won’t delve into that realm for now, we’ll keep in on the physical plane.

Okay, I get the picture, stop thinking negative thoughts, easier said than done.

Sure, this is not an overnight thing. Click fingers and stop thinking negatively.

But you can take baby steps.

Simple ones, and start with this:

Be The Guardian Of Your Thoughts

Stand guard, ever alert and when those tendencies to think toxic thoughts of others arise, observe (without judgement) and let them go. Do not hold them, just release their grip. It may keep rising back up, but just acknowledge and let it go.

We also do not want to start thinking negatively of ourselves for thinking negatively… that’s a viscous game.

And yes, this is a constant process. Until one day you realise that your consciousness has in fact altered and you no longer trash talk or trash think about others. Even when it seems logical too.

The benefit of this will come in the form of you being a happier and less stressed human. More loving of yourself and others. And that is a great thing and exactly what the world needs now. There will certainly be times in life when this will be tested – always is – but with a higher reasoning ability with less emotion involved we can really choose our responses instead of reacting to the world and its constant perceived aggravators.

And all if we all work on this there will be more love, less hate, more kindness, less friction, more understanding, less intolerance.

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